Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Where'd the Party Go?

Lately, The Boss likes to ask me where the party went. This line of questioning began over a week and a half ago at the end of our impromptu “Meet and Greet” barbecue for Topher as the guests began to trickle out the door.

At first she turned to the guests themselves. “Where are you going?” she’d ask.

“Home,” they’d say.

“Why?”

There were different answers, but none were deemed suitable. The Boss turned to me with each new departure, setting her eyes in a big, blue quiz on mine. “Where’d the party go, mama? Where’d the party go?”

I thought it was a good question. I could relate. It had been a fun party. There was food, there were friends, there were stories tossed around and there were balls thrown to the dog. The sun was high and warm, but not hot. The Boss got so much attention that she didn’t even notice the party wasn’t for her.

I thought it was a good metaphor, too. After the constant high of hope and expectation that came with pregnancy and childbirth, I was a bit nostalgic for the party, myself. Not that it was all fun and games—in fact, I was never really comfortable with the idea of living so deep inside myself for nine months. But it was different and intense and life-changing. After the baby was born, it was time to return to daily life. I don’t know quite what to do with that.

“Everyone at the party had to go home,” I told The Boss. “They had to leave so it would be just the four of us. So we could be a family.”

“Oh,” she said. She wasn’t any more satisfied in her acceptance of my answer than I was in giving it. But we let it go.

The question still pops up at random moments in that daily life we are slowly getting back into. Sometimes things are slow. Sometimes I am feeding her brother while she is thirsty. Where’d the party go, mom? So now we make plans. We talk balloons, hats and cake. We talk guest lists.

We are party planners.


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8 comments:

Amy said...

Brooks was obsessed with partys last year. He planned all his birthdays a different theme each year. Your girl is so cute.

Jene said...

I'll be in CT on June 15th. Plan me a party. :-) Can't wait to see you!

I may come up the day before or that morning - not sure yet. Then going to NY for a few days.

Amy - any chance that you would be able to make it up then too? I miss you!

Amy Lee said...

Yes, if Elizabeth would have enough room for us, I could. But she keeps on having babies...

katrin said...

I am always looking for a party, and I'm 42 years old. I want to laugh and dance and talk, and not do work or laundry or cook!

But I've had to learn over the years -- especially having older kids now -- that it's not really an either/or proposition. Life IS the party, even the dull buts. This is all we have, each and every day and all that is good and bad. I try really hard to find something meaningful in every day.

Chicky Chicky Baby said...

I find a couple of balloons and a cup cake does wonders for that after party letdown. Maybe two cupcakes.

iheartchocolate said...

I am a BIG post-party-blues sort of girl. AND I am the can't-sleep-night-before girl too. Put those together = FUN FUN FUN
not really. I think it would be easier to attend a party that to plan and host it. So, when you have your next-put me on your invite list?

Boz said...

The party's in Boston!

Andrea said...

I'm a little late to the party here but I wanted to say congratulations! He's beautiful, your new son.