Monday, December 18, 2006

What's That Smell?

I just came back from a week-long ski vacation. If you can identify this mountain, you win...absolutely nothing.
This view is from the condo where The Partner and I stayed with three friends. That's a total of four skiiers, plus me. I don't ski. I wouldn't touch a chair lift with a four foot ski pole. As they say on Sesame Street (or at least they did 25 years ago when I was watching it): "One of these things is not like the others, one of these things just doesn't belong."

I thought that a genuine hatred of all things wintry and snow-based would not be enough to ruin a week set apart from all the demands of real life. I thought that relaxing with a book and then doing some window shopping while the rest of the group hit the slopes would suffice. I mistakenly believed that I'd get some writing done.

I was wrong. It turns out I am far too lazy, selfish and hedonistic to embrace a vacation that does not revolve around my own interests and pleasures. Boredom bred resentment and suddenly I was that person I was before The Boss came along and forced me to cut the crap.

I wanted all The Partner's attention. While he was skiing, I sulked around town and then sat on a non-moving bus, talking to myself out loud about how the transportation system's poorly placed and misleading signage was ruining my life. When The Partner got back to the condo, I was surly. I got surlier still when he wanted to go to bed at 9:30 after a day of high-altitude exertion. Then surly turned forlorn as I stared at my glass of red wine.

It's my lack of perspective that ruined it for me. Inward focus renders the big picture peripheral. I wasted all the views.

Sitting here now, it's easy to see what a spoiled brat I was being. I should've made the most of the freedom that is a new place. I should've been happy that my husband was engaging in something he loves and almost never gets the chance to do. I went into it thinking I would have a good time, but, upon arrival, I didn't do anything to help the good time along.

I'd like to think I learned something from the experience. I'd like for The Partner and my friends to think I learned something, too, so that they might actually entertain the notion of going somewhere with me again. As it was, I was no fun. No fun at all.

It was like a fart in a car, that bad attitude of mine. It ruined it for everyone. And though I might have felt good letting it out, I was just as much stuck in the stink as the rest of the passengers.


Wendy said...

I use to be like that until our vacation to Gatlinburg, TN. My husband is, usually, the one to wander off and I would get upset. Instead, I wandered off with the child and we would stare at all the lovely streams they have there. Finally, it was hubby's turn to worry where we were and for us to go, "What?". I discovered my joy of wandering.

Actually, I would kill for a vacation where I could wander off and do nothing. I really need time to not worry about when someone ate, changing a poopy diaper or if someone is bored. I need to wander. I am now jealous of your vacation.

Nice to see you back, though.

Lauren said...

You were like a fart in a mitten! Don't feel bad, I got surly yesterday when Sean picked the Giants game over spending a day out with yours truly. It's a natural thing and you shouldn't feel guilty for it. Although you do owe the Partner lots of hot sex and foot rubs to make up for it all.

ps. I missed you! Don't ever go away again.

Mrs. Chicky said...

Admitting you have a problem is half the battle. There will be other vacations, you can make it up to him (and yourself) then.

As for a ski vacation, I'm with you. I grew up within 15 miles of a mountain but there is no way I'm getting on skis, never mind the lift.

T. said...

Hey Binky, I'm in your club. Not loving the ski thing. And that's tough to admit since I live in the freaking North! When I try skiing I have been told I resemble a monkey humping a football. Good times.

So I too, have been the fart in the mitten.(Thanks Lauren!) The only thing you can do is learn from this and if you ever have the opportunity to redeem yourself, do it. Prove to everybody you aren't just the sour puss from the past, you're capable of being the good time girl too!

Helps if you run naked through the hotel lobby while carrying a bottle of wine in each hand....

Not that I'm speaking from experience....

Kate said...

Don't be too hard on yourself. I can relate to wanting to make your time away special for you, too. We all have little time to ourselves these days, and we want to maximize the time off.

And as for skiing, I lived in the foothills of the Green Mountains for over 2 years and not once felt compelled to learn to ski.

jen said...

i have SO been that brat.


Jocelyn said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mrs. Chicken said...

Been there, done that, my friend. And I guess Breckinridge (sp??).

I'm glad you're back - just in time for me to leave. See you on the flipside - where I'm goin' there ain't no Internet.

Merry Christmas. I feel I should send a card. I guess my good wishes for your good cheer will have to suffice.

Jenifer said...

I hear ya, I have been a total brat lately, especially with the house stress and all. I tend to act like hubby is a complete insensitive jackass because he is not sympathetic enough to the stress I am going through.... DUH! He's going the same stress, plus more since he's the one who actually has to DO THE WORK!

I can have a fit, look back and hour later, and go "DAMN, I'm a bitch!"