Wednesday, August 08, 2007

The Eyes Have It

I have uniquely bad vision. I am not one of the people who can walk into a well stocked optician's office and walk out with a pair of contact lenses. Mine are always special order. I don't have much in the way of natural eyesight.

I've been through a host of eye doctors due to changes in geography. I am always amused by their reactions as they get the first inkling of just how bad things are. My favorite is the one who told me that it's a good thing I wasn't around in prehistoric days, because I would've been eaten by a dinosaur. I call him Dr. Darwin. Then there was today's appointment, when the doctor chuckled that I "have a little bit of nearsightedness." I call him Dr. Hilarious.

It was at this appointment with Dr. Hilarious that I realized another troubling element to my eye situation. Since it is likely that I got my abyssmal vision from my mother, and such things are usually genetic--not to mention passed down from the female--there is a good chance my children will suffer a similar affliction. From now on I have to keep a close eye (ha) on The Boss to see if she starts sitting on top of the television or holding books one inch from her face. Or tripping over her feet because she can't see what's in front of her--that would probably be a good clue, too. It's what happened to me.

My mother still speaks with venom about the pediatrician who repeatedly told her to yell at me for my scatter-brained ways when she kept bringing up to him my clumsiness. Though my mother thought there must be something wrong with someone so completely out of touch with balance, the doctor just figured I was in my own little world and needed to be jolted back to reality every so often. It wasn't until over a year later that she finally took me to an eye doctor who determined I was not only seeing poorly, but I saw single objects in multiples. It was no wonder I was falling all over myself. Though my mother was always the first and the proudest to say that I tripped along to the beat of a different drummer, she knew there had been something a bit extreme about my strange parade.

My main hope is that my children have their father's vision--but in the absence of that, I hope I can uncover any vision issues early so that they can get back to exploring their world with eyes wide open and fully functional.

I have to wonder if my inability to see far is what helped to direct me early on toward books, which I could hold close to my face as they opened up whole new worlds of imagination inside my head. If so, then at least I can justify the trials of my early four-eyed existence that way. I probably wouldn't be the person I am today without my start as the cross-eyed klutz who morphed into a bookworm with Coke bottle glasses.

So, it's not that bad, really. And we all know that it's also not nearly as bad as it could've been. Thank God I wasn't born a cavewoman.

10 comments:

Lawyer Mama said...

I have horrible, horrible eyesight too. I hear ya.

My husband's vision is perfect. Damn him.

Sarah said...

I'd keep a close eye on The Boss...you notice how she called both The Partner and Boz dad all weekend???

slouching mom said...

This is timely for me to read -- Ben's just gotten glasses, and neither his dad nor I wear glasses.

So we keep forgetting to bring the glasses with us when we go out (they're only for distance). As to the drive-in movie we saw the other week.

Bad, bad parents we.

Jenifer said...

My husband and I both have horrible eyesight. It's amazing we can even find each other's faces to kiss when we aren't wearing our glasses...

I think our kids are doomed.

Whirlwind said...

Husbands eyes are not so bad. Mine - horrible. Eineys - not so good although glasses have helped her alot. I remember when she got fitted, a man next to me wished me luck - said his kid had been through 3 pairs already that year. Thankfully she's kept hers intact and on most of the time.

So far the other two haven't shown any sights of difficulty seeing.

jen said...

ah yes. another thing we have in common...i have horrible eyesight as well and was cross eyed as a child...three operations later i still need glasses but thankfully have stopped walking into walls.

Michele said...

My eyes are 500/510, so I feel your pain. I worry about my kids too, but so far they seem to be pretty well sighted, especially when it comes to spotting the brownies I hid on the highest shelf. Apparently they have not inherited my woeful eyes, but definitely inherited my choco-dar.

Jen said...

I think your eye sight might be worst than mine! And that is saying something! My mother is legally blind though with cataract surgery her vision improved a lot! I am not as bad as my mother but it still gets worst ever so slowly as the years pass. I may try lasik if I still can in a few years, depending on how my eyes digress I may not be able to.

Boz said...

Your vision is worse than I thought, I did not realize you saw multiple images. I am no stranger to eye trauma. You might want to consider seeing an Opthamologist, if you have not already, preferably an experience one here in Boston at a teaching hospital. An Opthamologist will be able to diagnose a wider range of issues and has more comprehensive treatment options at his or her disposal. I realize you are a bit cash-strapped today with two houses and all, but after you have the vacation home sold you might want to consider a full examination at an experienced Opthamologist. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by doing so, particularly if they can recommend treatment. New treatments come out all the time. I'm sure Dr. Boz would not mind putting you up for a night if need be in the future.

toyfoto said...

this is so good. every word.